Stellenbosch

Well, I would have written a little bit sooner, but we have had some internet difficulties. You’ll all be pleased to know that I single-handedly solved that situation. J

I think I left off in the airport in Johannesburg. Our flight from Jo’burg to Capetown was pretty basic, and the drive from Capetown to Stellenbosch was lovely. However, we did see quite a few slums just outside the city. They stretched for two, maybe three miles. It was heartbreaking, not to mention odd, to see pitiful rows of shacks seated next to exquisite mansions. During the rest of the drive, we saw rugged mountains, rolling hills, remnants of the World Cup, and a strawberry patch spattered with weirdly life-like scarecrows. Honestly, I must say I found it rather creepy.

Now: let’s talk wine. We are staying at the Kleine Zalze Lodge. Let me translate that for you: the “Ridiculously Extravagant Wine-obsessed Lodge.” The view from our back porch alone is astounding. We overlook a golf course and an in-your-face closeness to the neighboring mountains. The weather is about 50-65 degrees Fahrenheit, just about perfect. Behind the lodge (which, it’s not really a lodge, but more of a conglomeration of stucco apartments), is a huge field of grape vines. It’s quite different from what you’d expect, of course, because it’s winter here and nothing is blooming. Yet it’s still lovely and most enjoyable. I’ll be getting up early with Dad to go for a run on the dirt road that runs through there. There’s a good likelihood I’ll catch a few pictures.

After we arrived here yesterday, we had enough time to check in, change clothes, and unpack until we had to leave right away for our dinner at Overlook. Again, I will translate: “The Ritzy Restaurant that is basically outside when it is basically thirty degrees and serves you next to nothing for way too much but somehow manages to have the most brilliant sunset imaginable outside.” Whew. That was long. And so was our dinner: four hours. The day we finish flying in from Timbuktu, and we have a four hour dinner. I understand that it’s just part of the deal, but hopefully the rest of our dinners won’t be quite so lengthy.

After dinner, we all slept for 12-14 hours and missed breakfast. It was well worth it. After we grabbed a quick bite of lunch with Uncle Ronnie (Dad’s lecture partner) and his son Mark, we took a cab to downtown Stellenbosch. The city is a college town but is surprisingly well-kept and crime-free. We bartered in the marketplace, and since it was late on Friday afternoon, we had some *allegedly* excellent prices. Lauren and I picked up some jewelry and trinkets while Dad shelled out the rands. The venders were incredibly nice, and we enjoyed chatting with them. However, because this is their livelihood, they were quite imposing, too. We poked a bit of fun at them and the old “I’ll make a special price for you” bit, and they were good-natured enough to laugh with us.

Afterward, the family toured the rest of the city for an hour and headed back to our Lodge. Then we once again had a four-hour dinner. I must admit, though, that both the portions and the conversations had grown in size and quality, so Lauren and I made it through all right. It’s about 12 now, and I have to get up at 8:30, so I think that will be all for now.

Our First Misadventure

Let the storytelling begin!

First, let me just go ahead and say that we are all safe. And pretty happy. Now I'll get to the good, well actually the bad stuff.

Let's start with the New York - Jo'burg flight. On this lovely, 14-hour flight of ours, we had an excellent pilot. He was so good, in fact, that he managed to hit every single pocket of turbulent air he could find. I'm sure pilots go a lifetime without achieving this feat. The flight was so turbulent that Mom had a fun little round of "motion sickness" (sometimes euphemisms are just the best way to go). This blessed pilot even managed to keep us from being overly-rested. How considerate. Our accumulated hours of sleep came out at a grand total of 19 hours. Now, I don't know about you, but in this family, an average of five hours of sleep per person does not lend itself well to cheery moods and beaming smiles. Quite the opposite, in fact.

So when we went to re-check our baggage for our Jo'burg to Capetown flight and discovered that even though we had paid for our tickets way back in the freaking month of April, due to retarded policy/bureaucracy, the gate agents insisted that we pay an additional rate equivalent to the same day fare. Which would cost $900 more. Why did they ask us to adjust our flight cost? It's complicated. It is always complicated. But from what I can gather, it has something to do with which credit card we brought. Whatever the case, please accept the fact that it was absolutely absurd for them to charge us more for tickets we had already bought. However, our resident Hercules (Mom), managed to move heaven and earth to save us from those greedy bureaucrats. She is eating a pear now to celebrate her epicness.

Next, we had a little ray of sunshine I will refer to as the "Ludicrous Lounge Lady." Oh yes. Because this story gets even better.

After we got through security, we wanted a break. Lauren and I have been tending suitcases for an hour while Mom and Dad battled stupidity in human form. Questionable words may or may not have been spoken. We almost couldn't find our way to the lounge. When we finally did meander on up to the lounge, we encountered yet another barrier. And yes: it is the Ludicrous Lounge Lady.

Here's what she wanted: credible proof of Dad's chairman status. Fair enough, yes? Well, here's the catch: Dad has left his physical USAIR card at home. Now, Dad still spends 45% of his time flying, he's still a chairman, and he still deserves access. So Mom goes to bat for us and diligently whips out her exhaustive notebook of important documentation for this trip. At least 12 attempts are made to convince L.L.L. that my father is, indeed, not a white collar criminal, but a simple, frequent-flyer man. I cannot adequately express the frustration that each of us are feeling. She is unwilling to accept anything less than Dad's actual USAIR card or an exact copy of it. Discouraged, the Thomas family leaves.

Well, we girls were discouraged. Dad was just plain put out. So Lauren sets up her laptop in the common area and goes to work. She is very focused. After ten minutes, she has finally tracked down a copy of Dad's documentation. Now we have another hero. Her name is Lauren, and she is boss.

After finding this brilliant gleam of hope, the Thomas Family confidently swaggers up to L.L.L. We all want to see her cry. Lauren presents the evidence, and we wait, holding our breaths. The lady, clearly upset that we are winning this superfluous war, sighs and grants us entrance.

Can I just say, this lounge is good. It's great, even. But the sweetest thing about it is that we fought for it. And we won. And who doesn't like to win?

Arrival #1

Hello, everyone! We arrived safely in last night (30 minutes early, even), and are well-rested. We were even treated to a foreign language prayer service in our taxi. It probably wasn't a Baptist church. We're at the lounge now, chilling out until we have to go through security. The next update will probably be more than...I don't know, 14 hours or so? Just a guess. :)

Welcome

Hey, guys! Our flight leaves tonight at 10:00pm. We are all super-excited and ready to go. I can't wait to share our stories and mishaps with all of you!